Non lo posso credere.

...it's over.
I can't even believe it.
These four months have flown!
There were some parts, of course, that took FOREVER,
and it wasn't rosy all the time (life never is),
overall I've had an incredible semester.

It's going to be so strange, going home.
I'm excited to see what's just the way I remember,
and what I've already forgotten.
I'm excited to see how fast I miss Italy, and how much.
It will be interesting to see when I come back, and for how long. Though I don't think I would ever live right in the center of Florence again, there's still so much of Italy I haven't seen, so much of Europe left to see as well, and lots of places I wouldn't mind living. We will see.

Finals ended up going really well - I feel like this may be the first semester I got a 4.0 in college! It may not happen, since there are a couple possible wildcards, but I doubt I will get any B's.

I also can't believe that we're leaving for Greece tomorrow! It just feels surreal. I'm pretty much done packing, though tonight we're probably going to have to re-pack, trying to distribute the weight more evenly and such. I can't wait to be there, lying on the beach, just relaxing. It's been a busy semester, and I need a break, for sure.

Well, I have less than 24 hours left to play in Florence, and it's a beautiful day, so I better get out there. I'll leave you with a part of my final project for my writing class, a poem called "Endings and Beginnings."



My life must fit in a suitcase. In the last week I have been fighting to choose what stays, what goes; and I cannot. It is easier than before, at least somewhat; I will try to take everything from this quarter of a bedroom, the tiny piece of Italian real estate I have boldly named my own, and shove it piece by piece, ticket stub by train ticket, leather boot by silky scarf, into my inadequately sized suitcases.

But it is an impossible task.

Not the shoving, of course – that’s more like an awkward game of three dimensional tetris. It will be difficult, but packing always is. More challenging is the delicate game of dancing through memory, reliving my struggles and triumphs in the hopes of bringing home this ball of light, this glowing sense and innate knowledge of where I fit in the puzzling mess of the world, and fitting it back in the hole I left for myself in the Rocky mountains. That, I simply cannot reconcile. I will be Columbus in his victorious return to a home that does not believe in the world he discovered; I will be the opaque olive oil floating just over the top of the crystal clear water of the life to which I return. I will be the last lingering blossom of wisteria, a hope of coming home changed to a world that is anything but peaceful. Nothing will make sense. Nothing will be Italy.

Ma a ogni uccello il suo nido è bello. Amerò la bella Italia per sempre, ma ... it’s time to go home to see not what will become of me, but what I will make of myself.

Allora...

My last weekend in Florence was pure bliss. How am I ever going to leave, now that it's getting so lovely?

Friday morning I got up early and went with nine other girls to a castle about an hour outside of Florence called Trebbio for lunch and wine tasting! They gave us a tour of the castle, one of the only inhabited castles in all of Italy, as well as the incredible cellars. The castle was especially incredible because it was the residence of a well known renaissance banking family in Florence called the Pazzi, who planned a conspiracy against the even better known Medici family for control of Florence in the 1400s. It was in this castle that they got together to plan that (ultimately, failed) conspiracy. So cool. I love history :) I just can't believe I got to play around in a castle where something so momentous happened over five hundred years ago! The weather was perfect for exploring such a mysterious castle -- dark and rainy. The thunder and lightning really added to the atmosphere!

We had the most wonderful morning, learning to properly taste wine and all about how Chianti is made. I'm so excited to bring my newfound knowledge home to my friends and family, so we can all have good wine together! Well, you know, after September. I still can't believe after four months of being legal, I will not be allowed to have wine with dinner or purchase wine in the grocery store all summer. It's a little ridiculous.

On Saturday, Rob and I once again hopped the SITA bus, this time to San Casciano, a hill town between Florence and Siena. We were picked up at the bus station by my music history professor, Anita, and her adorable little Italian husband Paolo. They gave us a tour of the city and the countryside, as well as their house, which was very recently a barn for sheep but was turned into a home eight years ago. They have the most incredible collection of music and art, as Paolo's father was a fairly prestigious artist. So much beautiful art! So, the main purpose of this visit was for me to get to meet Anita's friend Jody, a music teacher from New York that came to study abroad here in the 70s and, well, never left (bet you never thought of that possibility, eh family?). She's an incredible singer and so she was going to listen to me sing and give me some pointers. Instead, I got an hour long lesson on the basics that was really, pardon the pun, like music to my ears. This semester's voice lessons with Sharon I fear have done more harm than good, so it was really nice to just head back to the beginning and be given some things to work on that I feel I can actually accomplish. She made me excited to sing again :)

We also had a really fun, awesome lunch with Anita and Paolo complete with local wines, the most delicious pasta I've had in all of Italy (with an easy recipe I can make at home!), my first fruitcake (delicious), and a whole ton of ridiculous conversation and laughter. It was truly a wonderful day. It's a little bit sad, but I feel like the people I'll miss most from Italy are my professors. They've become real friends.

Yesterday it was horribly rainy, which was actually kind of a blessing because our trip to Cinque Terre got postponed indefinitely (the trail is still closed anyway, so it wouldn't have been that different than February), but we got a lot of studying done. I also started reading Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth ....oh gosh, I can't remember. Well, in any case, it's really wonderful. The first third is about her four months living in Rome, and there was so much I could relate to and so much that made me thankful for the time I've spent here. I also read through the part she spends in India getting reconnected with her faith, and I feel really inspired and centered after reading it. It's a good place to be during finals week.

Speaking of which, I just had my first final! It went alright...the test questions were, predictably, on the things I assumed wouldn't be on the test because we hadn't spent much time on them in class, but I still feel like I knew enough to do well. I have another final this afternoon (music history, which I'm only worried for because I want to do well to make Anita happy), and then one a day for the next three. I am going to do my best to study enough to do well, but not so much that I don't get to be out there enjoying my time in Italy...because on Saturday morning, it's all over. Well, at least for Italy. So that's just five days left in Italy. Wow.

It really is impossible to believe. It's been a whirlwind. I wish I had gotten a handle on things much earlier, especially my homesickness, so I could have been out there experiencing more and trying new things...but it's okay. I'm letting myself off the hook. There's only so much you can do in four months, and only so much you can grow and let yourself experience before it gets to be a little overwhelming.

It's funny...there are tons of reasons I'm glad to be headed home. I'm looking forward to having control over my life again (as in, I can cook for myself, eat when I want, study when I want, go to the gym, drive myself places, etc.) and really excited to be with my family again, but I don't know if I feel anymore like I got rid of the travel bug. Last week I was thinking I'd be content to just plop myself back in the United States and live there for the rest of my life. Today, I'm not so sure. I still feel like there's so much of Italy left to experience, and that's just one country! Still, I do have a wonderful appreciation of the United States I never had before this. I really do appreciate my freedom, especially when it comes to personal expression. I feel blessed to live in a country with relative political stability and where people are generally accepting of one another, regardless of how strange we are.

But still...
I don't know how long I'll be able to hold still once I get home. The world is an exciting place full of opportunities.

Speaking of opportunities, I feel like I best be seizing the day and making the best of it. I've got a bit of studying to do, then I'm off to enjoy the sunshine. Ciao!

Ciao a tutti!

Hey everyone,

So it's come to my attention that I've been slacking in my blogging. I hope I haven't lost everyone's interest! I do, however, have a couple pretty good excuses. I also plan to make amends by adding some sweet pictures to this post. Be prepared for a marathon! (Skimming is totally appropriate)

First off, let me state for the record that I made it through the earthquake safely. I am extremely sorry for not posting right after -- we didn't realize here in Italy how much international news the event was or even the extent of the disaster for a long time. Here in the pensione it's very difficult to get access to the news because we only have one tv and it's technically not for students to watch (though I sometimes watch X-factor, an American Idol-like show, with Marco, my friend who runs the front desk at night). In any case, we are totally safe. I'm told a couple people felt the quake, but I slept right through it (it was at 3.30am). The crazy thing though is that we were in Rome the day before it hit, where it was felt immensely but no real danger occurred. It has really been a horrible tragedy though. Several mountain towns are completely decimated, the number of homeless is somewhere near 28,000 and the death toll is over 200. So awful. We really are blessed to have not been there.

Being in Rome, however, was really wonderful! We had a whirlwind two day mini-vacation for our one-year anniversary of when we began dating. We hopped a train early last Friday morning, found our hotel, and spent the rest of the day wandering all over everywhere. It was a gorgeous day, and I would bet we walked over five miles just seeing and enjoying the sun. We got to explore the fortress we missed out on last time and ate dinner outside in the beautiful Campo de Fiori (flower market) piazza.

That night was quite the adventure, though not our normal exciting kind. We were awoken very, very early in the morning to persistent knocking on our door. I got out of bed and finally answered, and a woman had mistaken our room for someone else's and hadn't gotten the picture that it was the wrong one after over five minutes of knocking. After that the loud noises of the breakfast room next door kept us up, so there wasn't much sleeping. Very frustrating. The next day we ended up heading back early after another six miles or so of walking across town, as we were exhausted and the weather was getting bad. All in all, it was a really great trip though. Rob and I both agree that Rome is our favorite European city so far :)

Rob enjoys videotaping Rome a little too much :)

Monument to Italian Independence. The Italians call it "The Wedding Cake." They hate anything that is 'fake,' or in older style but built in the last 100 years.

The Spanish Steps were PACKED while we were there.

Twin Smart Cars! I wish I could parallel park this way.

Statue in front of the justice department.

French couples eating on the terrace of the fortress overlooking St. Peter's.

On top of the fortress with St. Peter's behind us.

It's finally spring!

Last week was a very hectic one for school. I had to give a presentation, write a paper, and submit a video audition online for a play back home all for Monday, and then for the rest of the week I tried desperately to fight off a cold that, unfortunately, attacked me in full force anyway. This weekend Rob and I had planned to go to the Amalfi coast, but the weather forecast was bad and the travel group we'd planned to go with was all booked up, and doing it all on our own was lots of work and pretty expensive, so we ended up staying in Florence. Though at first we were both bummed, it ended up being a really good decision.

Thursday we hung out at home, watched movies, and slept (finally! much needed.) Friday we took it easy, went to have some breakfast out by the Duomo and got completely ripped off (bad food, bad service, expensive place), and then took the bus up to Fiesole. Getting out of town was a much needed break. The weather was GORGEOUS, and we found a really lovely park with views overlooking Florence. We read some Harry Potter (in Italian) and even got to see a wild lizard! Quite exciting. On our way home, the bus was a bit more crowded. Five minutes or so into our ride, a woman near me gestured that I should watch my bag and pointed at Rob. I assumed she meant he should watch his bag as well, but apparently she thought he was trying to pickpocket me! So funny. Rob definitely looks like a sketch character though, you know, since he can't grow any facial hair and seldom looks over the age of 16.

That evening we headed to Sra. Russo's (our Italian teacher) for some Italian conversation and typical light dinner. It was lovely. Over wine, cheese, meat, and bruschetta we talked about our lives and Italia and the study abroad program. Really nice. Unfortunately it started pouring just before we left, so we ran to the bus stop and waited about ten minutes, only to realize that the last bus to take us home had already passed. The other women at the stop said the next bus coming through would take us closer than walking though, so we hopped on that one. Unfortunately, it got halfway and decided it was done (yes, they can do this in Italy. GR), leaving us further from home than before. So we walked a half hour home in the pouring rain. Not great for either one of our colds, although kind of fun, since it wasn't too cold out.

Saturday...oh, gosh, what did we do Saturday? Homework and movies, I think. Saturday was both of our sickest days. Blech. I think we got out mid-day and did a little shopping at the market, but that was about it.

Sunday we attempted to go see the exploding cart (an Easter tradition in Florence), but we had the wrong time and missed it by half an hour, so instead we went on a three hour journey through new parts of Florence. It was really, really nice! We were still pretty sick, so we stopped every thirty seconds or basically every time we found a new piazza or bench. We got to play with people's dogs, hear a part of a church service sitting out on the steps, and generally just enjoy the sun. It was really wonderful :)

Monday was another homework day. I got out and did some shopping on my own, and did lots of post-grad research, since it's something I've been thinking a lot about recently. By Monday night, everyone was home from Easter break and it was time to get back to work.

Tuesday was one of the most fun days I've had since coming to Florence. I had classes in the morning, and then after lunch I headed down to a building down by the Arno, where my voice teacher's ex-husband lives on the fifth floor. He was my accompanist for this semester and we had a concert that night, so I went to his apartment to practice. We played and chatted about life for about two hours, which was very fun and very relaxing, and then I headed back to school to get ready for the concert. A bunch of students and professors came, which was really lovely, and everyone was really supportive. I sang a Handel piece, a piece from a Schubert opera that I did with my Music History professor, who was the solo clarinet player in the Teatro Comunale orchestra for twenty years, and then did two arias from La Boheme. In particular, Mi Chiamono Mimi went wonderfully, and everyone erupted in cheers after. It was the best feeling! I sure hate the anticipation before a performance, but I love the rush you get from doing it!

Anita is explaining our piece before we do it. That's the stage of La Scala, the Milanese Opera, projected in the background.

Yesterday was also quite a fun day. We had our year-end photo as well as a year-end barbeque. It was a wonderful break from Italian food, and everyone was in a great mood, so it was a really good time.

I'm doing my best to do everything this weekend I have left to do, but it's so hard to fit everything in! Tomorrow I'm going wine tasting with the girls in a Renaissance palazzo just outside of Fiesole (trivia fact: it's where the Pazzi family planned the conspiracy to overthrow the Medici, the ruling family of Florence during the 1400s!). We've got a big lunch planned as well, as we get to bring some wine home! (Oh, I can just see my bag getting heavier and heavier...) Saturday Rob and I have been invited to my music professor's house for lunch and a little bit of music. She's invited her friend over who is a music teacher here, and she's going to give me a few pointers. Then Sunday, we're headed to Cinque Terre to do the final hike between all five towns that we missed on Valentine's Day because of landslides. We'll make it home just in time for finals week, crazy packing, goodbye dinners, and our trip to Greece!

Oh wow, I can't wait. I'm at the point now though where every day is special and while I can't wait to get home, there's something awesome happening each day, so I don't want to hurry it up at all.

Speaking of awesome things, it's risotto day for lunch, so I better head out!